This week's hero is a champion of all that is good, chairwoman Wendy “K is for Kremlin” Kenin announced, “As a municipality, this is one thing we can do to write some of the wrongs of our federal government.” Wendy has spent too much time tripping down the streets of the city smiling at everyone she sees, perhaps reaching out for rainbows takes the edge off of important social engineering… Then again, everyone knows it's Wendy.
The Peace and Justice Commission has decided to offer the Guantánamo Bay detainees a new home. The People's Unification Conference on Harmonious Coexistence, also known as; the City Council meeting voted on February 15 to invite a ballet dancer/terrorist and an Italian chef/terrorist to leave the sunny confines of their Caribbean home and move to the world's largest living museum of relics and ideas from the Planet 1969.
The cowardice of this resolution is astounding. They are only offering refuge to a pair of the detainees. It is hard to believe that a progressive mecca would have such a myopic view on peace and justice, especially when they have a commission to advance the very concepts.
Berkeley promises no money from the general fund will be spent on the plan… However the burden will fall to nonprofits, which were funded by the general fund… Ooops.
On the lighter side, the article in the San Francisco Chronicle, describing these events, was written by Carolyn Jones. Carolyn Jones played Morticia in the Addams Family. Carolyn no doubt was assigned the Berkeley beat because she understood what creepy, kooky, mysterious and ooky were all about. There are also rumors that Ms.Kenin is one of Pugsley's illegitimate children.
Lost in the shuffle is a perfect example of the zeroth law of thermodynamics. Those of you pining to return to the days of high school physics may remember…
When two systems, each internally in thermodynamic equilibrium at a different temperature, are brought in diathermic contact with each other they exchange heat to establish a thermal equilibrium between each other.
Berkeley needs to change. The terrorists need to change. What better way than to let them change each other. All of the terrorists should be brought to Berkeley. The first thing they would do is declare a fatwa on the city.
As the terrorists used the principal media of The Religion of Peace, stonings, beheadings and suicide bombers, their political discourse would bring about meaningful and permanent change. The monolithic ideals of the 9th century interpretations of Shia law, would be brought into diaphragmatic contact with the teachings of Karl Marx and Grace Slick.
The result would only be good.
Option One: The terrorists imposed Shia law and once again private property rights are respected in Alameda County. The people of New Berkistan find herded goats and calls to prayer several times a day are significantly less intrusive than mid to late stage narcotic addicts passed out or dying in public places.
Option Two: The Peace and Justice Committee unleashes lawyers to control the abuses brought about by the Religion of Peace. Facing the threat of severe sanctions, the next City Council Meeting becomes a replica of the Alamo. This inspires a greater understanding of Muslim teachings and inspires other citizens to bring about meaningful change.
A classic win-win scenario is just a few hundred more detainees away... God's speed.
I don't understand? Is this a call for "Morticia for Mayor"?
ReplyDeleteI dunno, I need to go find A.Cid and have a vision quest.
Keep 'em comming sir RA, enjoying as per usual.
Where was this blog in '95? I think us followers are missing out on 15yrs. of good reads.
BLTN